At my home in Sonoma
The Start:
I awoke at 7, turned the computer immediately on and tuned in. With an ear turned toward the computer, I got my hot cereal bubbling, and tea boiling. I prepared myself for the day's flow, which I knew would include ample happy tears, and high hopes for change. D.C. felt a world away from me, on top of the Sonoma Stable. No cold air to see my breath in or packed streets with smiling faces, cheek to cheek. I was alone and had sunshine, from wall to wall, in my barn bungalow, where lonliness is rarely felt. I can look out the window, and reconnect with the nearest tall hill's crest or an oak's wild span of branches. Or with a grey, a chestnut or a bay (these are colors of horses- which sound more like trees to the unfamiliar) below, in my window's glance.
But today, I felt connected to this nation, the nation that I often mentally dismiss. I will be the first to admit that I am far from patriotic. At times, especially overseas, I have felt embarassed to be an American. In the recent trip to Italy, we arrived to Rome, by chance, the same day that Bush did. We were welcomed by a parade of Italians shouting and fists were tight on signs reading "Go home!" Wounded American flags were flapping high in the cobblestone streets.
I, of course, take for granted this country, and complain about it's corporations, food system, and health care. But I am learning in life, that complaining about something does very little to fix the problem. I am working hard to leave behind this human tendency, in last year. I feel my heart reopening to my country. For me when hearts reopen, after becoming immune by bitterness, the damn breaks, and tears flow. But oh wait! Tears flow for me out of heartache, bitterness, confusion AND frustration. So be Amanda Mae. I am also learning to trust in life, in the heart, and myself. That I know what's best. That, what's best CAN have alot of heart in it. Maybe this country can also start trusting in life; and trusting in its HEART, and this country, itself, faults and all. What if we trusted God, Life and our country enough to honestly FEEL inside ourselves the positive change ahead? That to me, is letting go by surrendering the worry.
After feeling a connection to my country, the millions of smiles were my smile, and the millions of faces were ear-to-ear with my grin. With the national anthem closing the ceremony, I climbed out of bed, opened all three windows in my home. Hand, across my heart, I sang from it. To my surprise I didn't sound half-bad. I even sounded AMAZING for someone with a head and chest cold. Each horse looked up, with ears perked. After a silent moment following the song's completion, the macho burro gave his loud approval. In contrast, the hummingbird, who shares my barn home, chirped forth her sparkling sound. Her heart call. My heart answered with a "ping."
In the town center of Sebastopol
The Finish:
We drummed in new thoughts, new visions, new words that inspire change. We drummed out old modes, old routines of narrow thought. We laughed, smiled, danced. I shook a Brazilian Tamborine made out of cans that stained my hands gray. They drummed Brazilian Beats that sunk deep into the stories of my soul. The group started small, until people heard, and let the rhythm of their feet guide them to the source. They, like me followed, allowing themselves to be guided. Maybe they, also, wish for this country and each of its residents TO ALLOW. Allow Him to inspire, and guide.
As people gathered, the circle widened, people of ages, 4 to 75. One man, missing half-a-leg spun, circled, and wheeled, with the help of another man, together laughing. No one's ego stood between them and the evening, but were left on the other side of the street. The night was pure and the drums pounded truth and high hopes. The cruising cars of teenagers, halted in their tracks, parked to investigate the sound, and smiling faces exited. They may have only watched, or danced beside their cars, but either way they understood.
The in between:
The chocolate I ate at Infusions Teahouse in Sebastopol, while watching Obama's speech for the second time of the day:
"The strong 62% chocolate reflects Obama’s strength;
the chili is for his fire (just enough to give some pleasant heat at the end of a bite);
the almonds are for his grit;
currants because he’s up-to-date;
cinnamon and orange for his unexpected and refreshing aspects;
and the new form is for the positive change we expect Obama will bring."
I ATE THE WHOLE THING!
Buy yours at http://sonomachocolatiers.com/other-indulgences/chocolate-bars/change-bar.html
My favorite hang out spot in Sebastopol:
http://www.infusionsteashop.com/ LOVE IT!
Dad- teach mom- how to open links- online :) and I am waiting for your email Mom ;)
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